I do not know what to do, but my eyes are on You

I missed the party. My girl Beth Moore did an online simulcast on Saturday, and because of stinkin adulthood, I didn't make it. Evidently I missed a real good one.

Beth's blog is the only blog I check religiously (you should too. Find it here). I think I stalk her just a tad...its borderline unhealthy. But seriously, have you seen her hair?? Its a mile high. I can only dream of achieving such volume.


Yet, I digress. I logged on this evening to see what Miss Beth has been up to, hoping to find a recap of the event I missed. Did I ever find what I was looking for, and then some! Beth posted a followup book of sorts. A collection of scriptures dealing with the crippling stronghold of fear.

I definitely should have attended this one.

You see, its been a tough week here in Jax. The Lord has done a lot of humbling in this little heart, and let me just say that process never gets any more enjoyable. It sucks. Especially when the humbling comes from those you think know far less than you. Especially when you think you've been doing a bang up job.

Girlfriend, that's what you get for thinking.

Anyhow, when I stumbled across this little gem of a book, I skimmed its contents, saving most for later, but looking for something in particular that might really speak to me tonight. What my Mama keeps reminding me is so very true, girls: When you ask, Father never withholds in the wisdom department (James 1:5-8).

I asked the question a week ago today, not knowing what the coming day would bring. As I recounted my day to the Lord in my journal, I asked him very pointedly, "Was I not supposed to fight this battle myself?" I didn't even get the entire sentence on the page before I heard the answer so very clearly:

The LORD will fight for you; Hold your peace. -Exodus 14:14

Thanks to my precious Aunt who once doubled as my sunday school teacher, I committed this verse to memory, and it has long since been one of my very favorites. It served as a fitting answer to my rather silly question. Of course I wasn't supposed to stand up and fight that one. I'm never meant to fight my own battles. My warrior King has me covered on every front.

So when I stumbled across a passage 2 Chronicles, I heard Father reaffirm his answer in a beautiful way.

You do not have to fight this battle. Position yourselves, stand still, and see the
salvation of the LORD. He is with you, Judah and Jerusalem. Do not be afraid
or discouraged. Tomorrow, go out to face them, for Yahweh is with you.’”
-2 Chronicles 20:17

Have you ever heard the phrase "jumpin' Jehoshaphat"? I still don't know what it means, but it gets it's name from this guy. My boy Jey was the King of Judah during a time when they were scuffling with the neighboring country of Moab. King Jey knew the time would come that he had to face his enemies, and lets just say the man knew that when the day arrived, they were going to get their tails handed to them. That is, of course, if they fought that battle alone.

King Jey knew better though. He called on the nation of Judah and together, they fell on their faces and worshiped the Almighty. They admitted their weakness, and they sought his direction. You know how it ended? Not a single living Moabite, and so much loot it took 3 days for the men of Judah to collect it all.

My battle is much smaller, but I'm not sure I'm any less terrified than the army of Judah. Centuries later, the command is remains the same. Go face them. Do it tomorrow. Don't waste a single moment. Yahweh is with you, sweet child.

If you're thinking of me tomorrow and you happen to be the praying kind, ask Father to fill me with more courage than I could ever imagine. Pray for wisdom far beyond my 21 years. Pray for softened hearts for those I must confront.

I'm entering confused and helpless, but my battle cry is that of the army of Judah: "We do not know what to do, but our eyes are fixed on you." -2 Chronicles 20:12